Thursday, December 17, 2009

Black Balloon

Dear Chris,

After years of having the pleasure of being yours, I've realized how much I've come to love you for the amazing person you've proved a countless number of times to be. I've laughed with you until my gut can't take it. I've spent beautiful summer days in the mist of summer breezes with you, and wasting our time playing Grand Theft Auto until our eyes hurt. I've taken long walks on cold winter nights with you. Nights so cold we could see our breath as we talk about important things, and stupid things. Earlier in our relationship, those winter nights were shared saying goodbye as you walked to your home merely a mile away. Nights so scary, we ran away from the alley we called 'Rat Block'. We've spent spring days taking long drives out to random places as I fell asleep to get over allergies. And me with pink hair. We have marveled at the leaves changing from green to orange and yellow and red in a weekend. And i always hear you say "finally. it's getting cold." and me saying "nooo, i like it warm." :]. Those were amazing moments in my life. And the bad moments? Who cares. But the one thing I want to remember about those moments is that you've stayed through all of them. You've held me through all of them. You've held my hand the whole way in. Thank you. I know things aren't easy all the time, but i know we will make it, like we always have. I love you, Chris. That's the most important thing I can say through all of these words. heart.tif


Sunday, June 28, 2009

Human Nature


There's A Song My Jason Nevins Featuring Holly James Called "I'm In Heaven" For A Long Time This Song Has Sounded So Familiar To Me, I Realized Today It's Beat Was Used From Michael Jackson's "Human Nature" Which Is Now One Of My Favorite Songs By Him BesidesRock With You And You Rock My World. It's Really Such A Shame He Died Along With Billy Mays And Farrah Fawcett. 

Sorry For The Delay, Which I Highly Doubt Let Anyone Down. But Here Are Some Follow Up pictures:








Monday, May 4, 2009

Oh What A Night





This Night Made Me Realize How Much I Missed The Summer Of 2006, Even Through That I Realized- I Should Look Forward, And Not Be Afraid To Replace My Old Memories With New Ones. Because Either Way- They'll Always Be In My Heart Forever. Thanks Gir! :D

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Iris

You Yelled, I Placed My Head Down. You Screamed, I Turned Away. You Told Me I Was Just Like My Mother- I Looked Up At You And Looked You In The Eyes As Tears Streamed Down My Face.

I Cried Over You For 7 Months. 7 Months I Had To Pay Due To Our Faults- But All Of Them Pushed On Me.
5 Months Later I Came Home. We Started Over, Shared Stories, Laughed, And We're The Happiest We've Been In 7 Years.

1 Night, To Ruin It All. My Annoyance Drove You To Belittle Me Again. Make Me Silently Cry, Throwing Me Down Into That Familiar Dark Den I Know As 'Loneliness', You Compared Me To Her.

I Don't Know What Will Happen In 3 Hours, Tomorrow, A Week, Month, Year..

All I Know Is That If You Go Back To The Monster, And Let Those Cold Black Arms Of Death Embrace You;  I'll Run. And This Time I Wont Look Back.  

Sunday, February 22, 2009

I Must Be Dreaming

Ladies And Gentlemen.

Listen Up!

I'm Putting Together A Portfolio For Fashion Photography And I Need Models.

*NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY.

There's Beauty In Everyone :)!

Please Contact Me If Your Interested:

Starrzilla@aol.com

Leave Your Name, Age, Contact Number, E-Mail, With Your Best Facial/Bodily Qualities And Faults And Why You Are Interested.

All Are Welcomed.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

I Want To Break Free

This Whole Week Has Sucked For Me, I've Realized I Don't Have Many People I Can Rely On To Chill With Me, And That Staten Island Is Starting To Seem More Far Than It Actually Is. Yesterday At Around 7ish PM I Took The Last Tynol PMs That I Found In My Stash Box. I Vowed Never To Take Them Again Being That While In Pennsylvania I Popped Them Like M&M's And Used Them For Robo Trips. This Time I Just Needed Them To Sleep Because My Sleeping Habits Have Been Out Of Whack Since I Moved Back Here. I Woke Up Feeling More Sluggish Than Ever.
I Was Suppose To Cut My Hair Today. Like Short. Really Short. Boy Short Maybe. But My Hairdresser Was Sick And Couldn't Make It So I Had To Re- Schedule For Next Saturday.
My Dad Even Took Me Out- Which Didn't Help Much.
I Went Shopping. Which Didn't Help At All.

At This Moment, I Feel Like A Failure.

I Need Change.